Thursday, 16 February 2012
She's my best friend and I hate her...
My daughter is cool. She is composed, capable and kind. She is happy and strong and brave.
She is a softy. Her calmness leads, I suspect, to others taking slight advantage of her.
She has had a wonderful start to her new school year. She loves school and is keen and interested academically and quite passionate about ball sports - we have moved on from handball, to lacrosse and netball.
She is loved by her teachers and her friends - she has many - from all years - people grin when they see her. She has boys as friends too - the cheeky mischievous freckle faced lad in the year above her is one of her closest allies.
But her "best friend" is, dare I say it, not someone I can warm too. She is too bossy. Too manipulative. Too mean. Too insecure - and her subsequent behaviour is unpleasant. Spoilt, perhaps.
It is only just now that my little daughter realises this.
We talked it over last night, she and I.
The best friend is an annoying brag, apparently. Who is mean to her at times.
I am so rubbish at giving advice. If it were me, and my "best friend" was being mean, I would ignore her, or tell her to fuck off and cut lose. Not, I realise, the kind of suggestion that will appeal to my girl.
It's a small class in a small school. They have years ahead of them. Repercussions are possibly rife.
What to do? I wish wish wish I could step in and sort it all out for her.
All I can say to her is "A friend is someone who likes you, who cares about you, and who is not mean."
What would YOU do?
PS This post has been brewing in my head all day - I am fretting - and then I go here to one of my favourite blogs and Kirsty has it all sorted. See? That is the connection blogging creates. xx