In my words, she is a warm, incredibly funny and honest chick who lights up my world when we get together. You can laugh with her on Twitter, follow her goings on on Facebook, and read her blog here.
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Losing weight is a learning experience. The biggest thing I’ve learned is I am my best friend and my worst enemy.
You see I am the only person who can motivate me to lose to weight. I am the only person who can cheer me on, who can stop me eating donuts and reach for a carrot instead of a block of chocolate. I am the only person who can make me go for a walk or refrain from late night snaking. I can make goals and stick to them. I am blinkered when I want to be, dogged. I don’t lose sight of my personal aims.
I am also the only person who can break my goals - the only person who can self-sabotage with reckless abandon. Simple statements roll off my tongue like butter: “You look ugly”, “You’ll always be fat” and “Just have a day off from the diet, it won’t hurt”. All these statements start off quietly in my head and then get louder as the self-doubt grows. In a matter of moments, I can wipe out weeks of hard work. In a matter of moments, I can go from feeling invincible and proud of myself, to feeling like a loser unworthy of looking and feeling great.
After having my third child I decided it was time I got serious. Time to get my body back. But instead of losing weight, I was putting it on with gusto. At 84.5 kilos, I decided I needed a motivator so I signed up to the Michelle Bridges 12 Week Body Transformation program. It was the best $200 I’ve spent in a long time. It gave me the boost I needed to kick-start my weight loss.
My husband and I followed the program together, but about half way through we started doing our own thing. We didn’t fail, we just felt like we’d got we needed out of it. We’d both lost about 7 kilos each and were ready to go it alone. What we were left with was a new way of living. We now eat smaller portions, exercise regularly, don’t snack, drink less and eat much healthier.
The problem is I keep talking myself out of achieving my medium-term goal of losing 10 kilos. I’m so close I can taste it. I can get into size 14 jeans again and can see size 12 within reach. But as I start to reap the benefits, my negative voices get louder. At present, I am having an internal struggle to stop the self-sabotaging. I’ve plateaued.
I have 7 more kilos I want to lose. I need to get serious with myself and get back into a strict routine. Head down, bum up. Hopefully, in a few months that head of mine will be filled with only positive thoughts and my bum will be a lot smaller.
How do you fight the self-sabotage?